my sisters under your porch take her home
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
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