I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I wish you could order shots online.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
