Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
love makes seman taste better
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize