I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
