are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Randomize
