Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
