There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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