Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
