hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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