I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Randomize