Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
