You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Randomize
