i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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