her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize