on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
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