I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
