Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
