distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
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you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
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I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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