After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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