Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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