PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
