Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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