Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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