end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
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I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
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Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize