Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
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