I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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