I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
