And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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