That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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