Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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