He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
