i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize