I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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