I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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