I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Who died my cat blue again?
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