Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
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