So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
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just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
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He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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