if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
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