absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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