**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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