I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
