white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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