I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
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