I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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