I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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