Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Randomize
