youre lurking in front of me
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
