Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
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she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
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I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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