you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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