"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
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