yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
