..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
